Talking and Listening

It lurks in the shadows, waiting to claim its next victim. That victim will be completely dissected, and unable to do anything to prevent the deadly venom from reaching its fatal mark. Onlookers or passersby may not realize that they are watching a life being destroyed. But destruction is in its wake. Sometimes the devastation is totally silent and painless. At other times it is loud and boisterous with screams of agony and pleas for mercy, pleas which are never granted. The ruin is complete in that it pierces to the heart. The pain is such that no medication can stay its hurt. No one is immune from the attack. It strikes young and old, rich and poor, tall and short. But strike it does.

Who is this fiend? It's the same enemy that mankind has battled since his creation – the judicious use of the tongue. Now, don't tune me out just yet. The words we tune out, may be the very ones we need to hear.

There is a very real danger in any group of people, Christian or not, for the members to judge one another and then to compare notes on their findings. Scripture calls this gossip. We call it being concerned.

There is wise counsel hidden in the words of Frank Clark who said, “Gossip needn't be false to be evil, there’s a lot of truth that shouldn't be passed around.”

The apostle James had some very biting remarks to say about the improper use of the tongue. “Out of the same mouth proceeds praise and cursing. My brothers (and sisters), this should not be!” (James 3:10)

As sad as it is, I have found, as have many others, that the same hand that pats me ON the back on Sunday, may very well be the one that stabs me IN the back on Thursday. (This is Tuesday, so I am safe!)

John Wayne may have been closer to the truth than he realized when he said, “Talk low, talk slow, and don't say too much.”

How much better to sit in silence than to destroy someone's character? How much better to keep quiet than to have to apologize to someone for something we’ve said about them? How much better to be viewed as not having an opinion than to be viewed as one who only has a negative one?

We do the work of Christ a great injustice when we continue to tear down the lives of others with our talk. And we are just as guilty when we listen. Do we have to be so miserable that we drag others into the mire with us? Must we be so lonely that we push others into the same despondency? Should our gloom prevail upon us to cause others to live in the same melancholy state? I think not.

We should examine ourselves. What have we been saying about others? What words have we been giving ears to that otherwise would fall to the ground. Perhaps we have encouraged someone in their sin by just listening. When the next conversation turns sour in this manner, excuse yourself. You, nor I, do not have to sit and listen. Maybe the Holy Spirit will use your exit to convict the other party.