A Father's Legacy - Part 1

As I stated yesterday, the birth of the fourth consecutive generation of male named Mann with the middle name Lee has caused me to contemplate a bit on some things. The next two days, I will be writing a bit about my father. I will be sharing about him through comments I made at his funeral. My intentions then will be to take some time to write about my mother. After all, her impact on me was just as significant.

My Dad's name was/is Robert Lee Mann. He was 66 when he died on December 11, 1999. The exact cause of death is unsure. He and I along with my son Richard (who is 24 now) and Richard’s son Gideon, as the oldest male in each family share the same middle name. My mother died in 1976. He was married to her for 23 years. He had been married to my step mother, Alice, for 23 years on the day of his death. Yes, he died on their wedding anniversary.

They estimate death occurred around 4 or 5 a.m. Some time during Friday night or early Saturday morning (December 10-11, 1999) he got up, went to the living room to sit in his favorite location on the sofa. Alice woke up at 6:00 and found him still seated in the same location. The paramedics said he died quickly, as there was no sign of any struggle.

Here is where the story of my father’s death is truly interesting for me. We have all heard it said that “truth is stranger than fiction.” In this case, that is certainly accurate. February of 1999, I traveled to the Carolinas where my Dad lived to spend time with him while he underwent some extensive surgery. He came through the surgery and appeared to be doing well. That initiated what became a very interesting series of events for me over the remainder of the year.

In May of that same year, I was in Phoenix, Arizona for a conference. The flight home was not full, so it was easy to have time alone. Not too long after we were in the air, I sensed the Lord’s leading in what was to be my message at my Dad’s funeral service. I am not sure why I felt that way, but it was clearly not something I planned. I just knew God wanted the words prepared. I pulled out my laptop, and while flying back wrote my Dad’s funeral service. The next two blogs I would like to share some insights from my father’s life intermingled with the comments I made when I spoke at his funeral service. I called the message: “Lessons I Learned from My Dad.” These are lessons I learned followed by challenges for us today.

Lesson #1: Lives can change – we should never give up on another person.

Many of you have heard me share the facts of my early childhood. My Dad was an alcoholic, and not a pretty one at that. That led to us being pretty poor much of our childhood. Church was not an important part of our lives until my mid teens. At that time Christ came into our home, and totally revolutionized it. I was 14 years old, and having a difficult time understanding how this man could go from being a man controlled by a substance to being controlled by the Spirit of God in one day. I did not get it then. Now I do. God changed my Dad.

Do not give up on any person in your life. God can change them. My Dad's life is a true testament to the grace of God and how God can indeed change a life. My Dad did indeed have the lapses that we all experience, but he was never at the place he was before Christ rescued my home.

Lesson #2: You do not have to be perfect for your kids to love you – there is unconditional love.

My Dad was not perfect, even after Christ intervened in our home. He was far from it. But we loved him. I still do. If you are a parent, share your struggles and admit your failures to your children. They see them already anyway. Ask them for forgiveness when it is appropriate. They will not love you less for it – they will love you more!

Lesson #3: God’s grace is bigger than any mistake I can make – rest in that grace when it is needed.

I am amazed how God interceded and forgave my Dad for his previous life and actions. He has done the same for me. He will do the same for you. Rest in God’s grace. Your deeds will not be good enough anyway, rest in his grace. He does not ask you to be perfect and then receive forgiveness. He offers grace where you are, as you are. Let’s face it . . . that is far better than our best attempt at perfection.

My Dad was a blue collar worker who never completed the eighth grade. However, his life taught me some lessons that I may not have learned any other way. Lessons that I hope I pass on to my children. Tomorrow I will give lessons 4 – 6.